My cockatoo, Charity, is a taco-thief. As proven today. As she flew away with a whole one, as big as her body.
Tacotoo!
My reactions to things are weird.
3 weeks ago · 16 notes
What ingredients does it take to make you?
fuckinghiddleston is made of Folk, Jazz, and apathy. With a dash of porn.
AJ Kline is made of eggs, tired, and distractions. With a dash of fanfiction.
YUP PERFECT
Rowan Gill is made of wine, tree bark, and villainy. With a dash of Armageddon. Seems accurate.
“Nicole is made of smiles, lazy, and earthquakes. With a dash of Armageddon.” Literally me.
“Beth is made of puppies, wood, and moonlight. With a dash of Disney.”
(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧
“Slim is made of poison, Metal, and automobiles. With a dash of Rick Astley.”
they forgot the man harem
Fable is made of dice, lemon, and time. With a dash of Chemical X.
I’d like to think I’m Buttercup.
3 weeks ago · 46,724 notes · Source
Someone gif this shit, PRONTO
1 month ago · 4 notes
Look what you did, Reed!
1 month ago · 11 notes
Control is an illusion.
Enzo casually opens and closes her cage door with zero trouble. All the fun goodies being on the inside of the cage is the only reason I don’t come home to pure chaos every day. That and chasing after the dog lost its appeal after a few weeks.
Freakin’ little imp.
1 month ago · 3 notes
So I sent a writing sample in to 50 Shades of Green for their ghostwriting contest. I’m not sure even 13 year old me would write something so heinous, and this is pretty damn heinous. I even squeezed an R-Pat reference in there. I was cracking up while writing.
Should I feel proud or wretched? Both? Yeah, both is good.
1 month ago · 1 note
Definitely the most badass use of the species name.
1 month ago · 2 notes
How to instantly kill my enthusiasm for a movie
- *seeing a cool scifi trailer*
- Me: Aw neat a high concept space alien movie
- Me: Aw they've invaded everything and cool eyeball effects
- Me: Aw sweet that architecture is ballin' and look at those...
- *inoffensive male lead pops in
- Me: Wait.
- *bland female lead pops in*
- *they stare longingly into each others' eyes*
- Me: Wait a second...
- *from the author of--"
- Me: aw No.
- *Twilight*
- Me: aw NO!!
- *Stephanie Meyer's The Host*
- Me: aw NOOOOOOO!!!
1 month ago · 47 notes
Tumblr Scrabble
There should be a game called “Tumblr Scrabble” where you win by using only words that Tumblr invented or misuses on a regular basis. Half the fun is arguing semantics and debating the origin of the word.
2 months ago · 8 notes
Old version of Be Prepared was a bit more….creepy.
Ew Scar. Just…ew.
And I thought the Broadway version of this scene was unsettling.
2 months ago · 315 notes
